It just struck me that I miss home. Was reading some singapore website and the hk series. 7pm and 9pm prime time shows. I miss them. I wish I was home.

It occurred to me that most of the sayings are unreal. People say for the sake of saying it and also perhaps for comfort.

"...the one who is worth your tears won't make you cry."
"You reap what you sow."
"Good girls get good guys."-had this when I was p6. haha!
"This is a silver lining in the cloud."

Like whatever. Somehow they don't seem apply.
I was thinking, I am always critising things until even when I truly experience something nice, I know I don't see it because I am blinded by the downs. However, I guess it is partly because of fear. When we really light up because of a heart-warming thing, we kind of are more predisposed to experience an emotional roller-coaster--those which you have a peak and a plunge all the way down, until you are at ground level.

Had an angina attack during tut today. Fear overwhelmed me. My chest just got pain all of a sudden. Just by sit there, doing nothing. I wasn't even talking. For a while I thought, what if I just collapse on my way out of the class? I was afraid because I wasn't in the apartment or sth. It wasn't the first time. But that incident felt like the last. I was truly intimidated then. I tried to calm down and breathe deeply to stop my heart from palpitating so fast. I can't emphasize more on the trepidation I had then. esp when we were discussing atherosclerosis and angina. I was pretty sure I had unstable angina.

On my way back...nvm. shan't discuss.

I met mic at the mall. He was with his gf. Most likely. Then when I came bk, it hit me that good guys are either gays, attached or dead. what is with the leftover species?...Just like how often I have my pms, they are just as bad with their mood-swings and perhaps arrogance. *shrudders*
It's just like finding a needle in a haystack. Worse still, in the atlantic ocean.